A few months ago, I had the opportunity to conduct a workshop with a group of young boys, who lived in a boarding set up away from home. These young boys surprised me with how they expressed their experiences while living away from their families for months. It is undoubtedly challenging, living away especially in a busy city, which paradoxically may feel very lonely.
Along with the melancholy and reminiscence, these pre-teens proudly and spontaneously highlighted the benefits of living alone. “Learning to adjust, being independent, self-reliance, humility, maturity” were only some of the responses that had me thinking. While reflecting on my experience with these children, the resilience and their ability to see the benefits in their hardships came to the fore.
The reason I decided to write on this topic, is that I realised a number of my clients have actually moved to Mumbai from their home towns to work, study, eek out a different life. Some live alone, some live with colleagues, friends or relatives. Others, from Mumbai, but live outside their homes. And yet others, feel ‘not at home’ in their own houses. Some find comfort, some don’t.
Regardless of these specificities, moving anywhere, however near or far, can have a major impact on your mental, physical, emotional and social health. It isn’t an easy step at any stage of our lives. Some tips follow:
Seek Support: keep in touch with family and friends, seek out new social connections, find a psychologist or counsellor to connect with to mobilize skills to best cope and make your experience in your new place optimal!
What am I learning from this hard time?: This is a great question to ask yourself, in any situation which you feel is putting you under pressure.
Focus on your capabilities: Think about past times you have overcome difficulties and what skills you have that helped you ace them!
Accept that it is a difficult time + Think about what you are hoping the end will look like: Think about the best possible outcome of your journey here. Think about it in detail. How long is it going to take, what you are going to do to get you there, how does it feel to achieve it, feel it as if it is truly in your possession. Once you are done visualising it, open your eyes and go get it!
Remember, if you require a little help or support along the way, seek it. This will only ensure you get to where you want to be, with more certainty, while taking care of yourself along your journey!