As a follow up from the last post on increasing internet usage in children, this post speaks about the role of self- acceptance in determining the effect of social media.
What is self- acceptance?
Self- acceptance is not determined by how good one is at certain things, or what one has accomplished, or how hard one is working, or how well one is doing in life. Self- acceptance in its truest form is unconditional. This indicates, that one can accept oneself for everything he is, regardless of the above. It surely involves the process of becoming aware about ones truest self- something we are often hesitant to find out.
Why is self- acceptance so important?
Once I accept myself for who i truly am, devoid of my accomplishments, efforts, skills; I would be able to be much kinder to myself. For example, if I can accept that I have been going through a hard time lately, and have not been performing my best, I would be able to accept that as the truth and refrain from criticizing myself about how terrible/unacceptable it is to be in that state!
(This beautiful work of pen and ink art is done by Rujuta Deshmukh)
How can self- acceptance contribute in controlling how we allow social media to influence us?
When I have truly accepted myself- my flaws and all, it would make it less likely that external recognition, from social media would influence my thoughts, feelings and behavior. Thus, negative comments, peer pressure, would not affect how I see myself; since I see myself for who I truly am, regardless of how others see me.
What do I do to cultivate it?
Try to reduce usage of conditional statements like:
“I’ll be happy, once I begin working”; “If I get someone to love me, then I can love myself”; “I will be okay when….”.
Try alternative statements like:
“I may not be the best at this, and that is okay”; “I am trying to accept that I progress at my own pace”; “It is okay to take it easy, because this is what I need to do for myself right now”
Importance of self-care:
Do at least one thing every day which is purely and solely for you. Have a nice long shower, apply moisturizer, meditate, exercise, listen to music, watch your favorite show, exercise, paint your nails, create some art, write something, read a book- or literally anything that you enjoy doing.
Remember that you are not competing with anybody:
It is okay if someone else got better grades, better gifts, a hotter boyfriend/girlfriend, more ‘likes’ or ‘shares’. It is okay! Because that does not define who you are! And we are on a journey of accepting ourselves, nothing other than that.
Be compassionate toward yourself:
Understand that it is okay to feel the way you are feeling, and being where you are!
And yes! That is exactly what it is! It is a journey of learning who you are, seeing yourself for just that, and learning to accept yourself, little by little, more and more everyday…
…It is an ongoing process, a journey you need to continue taking for the rest of your life!
Remember, it is okay to be ‘ImPerfect‘!
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